Sunday, August 13, 2017

Facing your Demons

When I set out on this journey of living alone (pretty much for the first time ever), I knew there would be demons to face - wounds that appeared to be scarred over but were really just covered, not healed.

The big challenge with these demons is that they pop back up when you don't expect them.  They catch you unprepared.  Peacemaker and people-pleaser, I have been hurt by others, have breached forgiveness and tried my best to keep things smoothed over.  I have held back painful words as I didn't want to make things worse.  I now realize that isn't good for me, nor for the other person.

"Be a Lady until the end" is what my mom always said, and I excel at rising above and not stooping to anyone's level, but can't I still be feminine while stating the truth?  I want to know if I ever hurt anyone - it's the only way to work on improving.  So, isn't it also fair to me to enlighten others of their harmful behavior?  I didn't realize that perhaps they didn't know.  I just figured their actions and words were intentional and obvious.
 
Having the challenge of wanting everyone to like me, I have actually been disrespecting myself... and not liking myself.  Sometimes the truth hurts - it doesn't have to lead to an argument or destroy a relationship unless the other person is unwilling to accept their hurtful actions.  In which case, you obviously need to side with yourself - as that is who you are going to be with for the rest of your existence.

This is the "Clear" part of my Cook, Clear & Connect mission.  Your connection to self and spiritual guidance can't be as smooth if you have negativity clouding it.  Clearing can be painful and the main reason issues are covered is because they are difficult to confront and process.

No comments:

Post a Comment